I LOOOOOOVE ICE CREAM!

One of my favorite food ever is ice cream. Always have been and always will be.  It's creamy, soft, silky. It soothes my cravings for softness and kindness. It's one food I feel that takes care of me in the nicest way. 

I used to buy gallons of highly 'processed' ice cream full of sugar (you know the brand names found in every food store) and it would scare me a bit to eat the whole gallon!!!

Now, I keep frozen fruits in my freezer. I buy bags of frozen fruits. I also buy organic fruits in bulk (on sale when very ripe and that's when they're perfect to be frozen). 

Fruits, only fruits. Strawberries, blueberries, mangoes, bananas, raspberries.

Today I had blueberries, banana and mango sorbet. Sprinkle a bit of shredded coconut and raw cacao nibs on top. Heaven!

I use the blank plate of a Champion juicer but you can also make this in a blender. You need to thaw the fruits a little before blending.

Who would imagine how good this tastes. The banana makes it extremely smooth and all creamy. The banana enhances the taste of the mango and finally, the blueberries not only have a lot of antioxidants, but they also give a beautiful color to the mix.

With all my support, Anne

DRINK SUPERFOODS!

One of the most important part of my diet are superfoods.

What are they? they are foods packed with extraordinary properties, like spirulina, blue green algae, chlorella, bee pollen, maca, goji berries, raw cacao and more. They're full of nutrients, essential amino acids, minerals, packed with vitamins.  They feed your body at a cellular level so it is important to eat them on a regular basis. 

I found that some of these mixed together are just incredible, like goji berries with raw cacao nibs. Or I tried avocado with cacao nibs and agave nectar.... I'm telling you, this is to die for.

I'd like to share the recipe of  a very interesting smoothie I had today:

2 tbsp sesame seeds

1 tbsp raw cacao powder

1 tbsp raw cacao nibs

a bit of stevia (to taste). If you don't like stevia, you can use one or two dates.

2 bananas (medium)

2 cups spring water (less if you like this to be thicker)

1 tsp maca 

1 cup greens of your choice, I use silverbeet (collard) or spinach. 

Blend everything. 

Delicious, even if you think the mixture green plus cacao looks rather strange, and I thought it was but I kind of feel adventurous in the kitchen these days. This is truly good and packed with nutrients. 

Superfood drinks make me feel gooood. They make me feel totally satisfied. I don't want to eat anything unhealthy after that. I want to FEED my body, I want to feed my cells. I want my body to feel great and full of energy. 

This is the difference between being fed at a cellular level versus eating SAD or highly processed foods containing NO nutrients whatsoever even when they say the contrary on the labels. The added vitamins or minerals in there are all chemically processed. The body cannot use them, it doesn't recognize this kind of foreign nutrients. 

Try it and feel free to share other recipes!

Till next time.

Always with you on the path, Anne

REMEMBERING MY BODY IS THE MASTER, NOT MY BRAIN...

I would like to share something that happened to me today. Got up pretty early this morning, had a green juice around 7:00am (celery, cucumber, ginger, lettuce leaves, apple). Cleaned the house, including the fridge!. Then had my fruits at around 9:45am (large bowl of mixed fresh fruits, mangoe, orange, banana). Had a smoothie (silverbeet + mango + superfoods) at 11:30am. Of course, at 3:30pm, i'm hungry. So I eat a salad (avocado, lettuce, tomato, seaweed...). But i was still hungry and i have been pretty hungry these past few days simply because i haven't eaten enough (don't have the right stuff with me at the office or it takes too much time to prepare or i don't feel like eating this again...). The truth is I have been thinking about eggs for 3 days now. I want eggs. Badly. I haven't eaten any because they're cooked.

I have to remind myself that I was a compulsive overeater for a very long time. My body demands and needs certain nutrients / foods for specific reasons my brain does not and cannot understand. So I FINALLY honored that craving. And I had 4 eggs... i know this is a lot BUT i feel SO much better..... I feel gooooood!

It is so easy to go back to old patterns. This not eating the eggs I really wanted to eat was like the old "no i won't eat this because this is not allowed on my diet" and next thing you know you're bingeing heads on on anything and everything around you. 

So it makes me think how important it is to listen to my body and honor whatever his needs are to properly function. It is so easy to loose communication with my body. I get caught up in what I read in such and such books and such and such schools of thoughts on the subject and I lose sight of myself, of my needs, of my body. Like in the old days I got caught up in fad diets. But I am not there anymore. I constantly have to remind myself where I come from and where I am now. This is my path, still very raw, wonderful and so full of teachings. No path is identical to any other. The important is to stay on it. 

With love, Anne

MIRACLE OF RAW FOODS: MY TASTE IS BACK

Today it occurred to me another miracle has happened. I can taste food now. I mean really really taste it. I know this sounds silly but it is true.

In my compulsive overeating days, I couldn't taste what I was eating. I binged. I stuffed myself compulsively. I never had enough. In order for me to really taste/smell/feel anything,  the food had to be either extremely sweet, or extremely salted. Maybe did I taste the first bites, but after half the pint of ice cream was gone, I was unable to feel anything. I was numb. I was on a high from -usually- sugar. Like a robot, the spoon would go from pot (rarely from a bowl or a plate) to mouth, pot to mouth and went on till nothing was left. When I was not bingeing, I was not really tasting anything either. I was too preoccupied with the calories I had on my plate.

But now, my taste buds are rejoicing at every meal! 

This morning I had the most beautiful plate of fresh fruits, a mix of mangoe, black plums, litchees and pineapple. It was total heaven! The sweetness and slight acidity of the fruits were just a perfect match. It was like an explosion of sunfoods full of natural sugars. Nothing was missing. Everything was there in a perfect synergy. The pineapple was enhancing the taste of the mango which was in turn supporting the sweetness of the litchees and plums. It was juicy and melted in the mouth. I felt totally satisfied and did not feel the need to eat anything else.

When I was hungry again later, I had mango, silverbeet leaves and some superfoods (spirulina, aloe vera and dried purple berries) all blended together. I love the taste of this smoothie. The mango gives it its sweetness, the silverbeet its green smooth taste. The color is unreal. It is a very dark green created by the mix of silverbeet and spirulina.The texture is like one of a pudding which I love (highly processed puddings were items I used to binge on a lot). This smoothie is fulfilling and holds me for a few hours.

I finally enjoy and taste/feel/smell the subtle perfumes hidden in a mixed smoothie, in a sweet and juicy Pink Lady or Golden apple or in frozen raw cacao fudge melting in the mouth... it is like an explosion of pleasure. I enjoy preparing delicious foods, either from recipes I pick in raw chefs' books or I create my own. I have a lot of fun and pleasure in my kitchen now. 

Raw foods revealed to me one of the best pleasure we have as human beings, the taste. This is total happiness!!!

Till next time, with all my support, Anne

MIRACLE OF RAW FOODS

Hi there, this is Anne. 

Three days ago, I woke up with this headache (I never have headaches!) that went worse during the day. I felt slightly sick to my stomach (in reality the liver), and exhausted. This is very unusual to me nowadays. I usually feel very energetic and very healthy.

But instead of beating myself up a little bit more like I would have done in my compulsive overeating days, I decided to treat myself the best I could. 

I treated my liver with essential oils (it does wonders!), added a few drops of lemon in my water and ate lightly. In the evening I just did no-thing. A real treat since I am really busy writing and preparing for my website soon-to-be. Instead, I comfortably sat in the sofa and watched three episodes of Seinfeld. As I say, LE BONHEUR! (total happiness!).

I can't stop comparing how I am treating myself now to how I used to beat myself up again and again in my hell days of eating. Even sick (with a stomach flu!), I was overeating. I am SO grateful now that this is over. I am SO thankful to the Universe to have put me where I am now and be able to share this with you. 

Now every time I am eating, I am treating myself like a queen. My body deserves the best (phew! what a change!). I spend time in my kitchen and I have such a pleasure to prepare a delicious raw meal. 

But what is raw foods? Raw foods has not been heated above 118 degrees Fahrenheit (about 48 degrees centigrade). So basically, the food is not altered by heat and all the enzymes, vitamins and minerals are still present (heat destroys them). This is a vegetarian/vegan diet with a lot of fresh foods, no not only salads!

Eating raw was and is everyday a total revelation. The one incredible thing that happened only after a few weeks, and I have to share this with you, is my life-obsession with my weight disappeared. Even when I was eating healthy, whole and organic foods, and my overeating was in control, I  was still obsessed with my weight and how many calories I was eating. After a few weeks of eating raw, the obsession disappeared. It is as if a little fairy came to me and touched me with her wonder stick! 

When did I start to go raw is hard to say because it really happened naturally to me. I have been drinking healthy smoothies for at least 3 years and I started to read about raw foods only 9 months ago. Then I started to add a few things like greens and superfoods (spirulina, raw cacao, maca...) to my smoothies. I really changed pretty much everything in my diet 4 months ago. So it was gradual. 

To conclude rapidly on this (there is so much to say about it all!) is that my cells are finally getting what they were craving for all these years. Finally, my body is really nourished and can finally take a back seat and let me enjoy life to its fullest. 

I will tell you more and more about raw foods along the way.  

Anne, always with you on the path. 

Dieting (1)

At the office today, we celebrated a French tradition called "les Rois" (The Kings). The origins of this tradition can be found on line so I won't get into the details of it. But this is essentially about eating the "Galette des Rois" (the King's cake) and drinking champagne. A hidden bean is inside the cake and the person finding it is "elected" King or Queen. The cake made out of white flour, butter, almond flour and white sugar is round and flat with a sweet almond paste in between two thin crusts.
In the past, I would have been totally thrown out to have succombed to a piece of Galette because the current diet I was on was under threat.
Being a compulsive overeater, I was either on a binge or on a diet. If on a binge, I would have eaten as much as I could have. On a diet, I would have tried to eat as little as possible, get depressed about it, feel guilty about not eating the whole piece (what are my co-workers going to think?) AND feel guilty because I was eating a piece. The monologue in my head would have been something like "ok, let's try to figure out how many calories are in a piece of galette des Rois. 500 calories maybe so that gives me only 300 calories left for the day. But if I exercise for an hour, that's 400 burnt cal. Maybe I could exercise for two hours so that makes 800 burnt cal. I could do the regular cardio workout and add the fat burning aerobic class as well." This internal monologue would go on and on while people around the table were having a good time. Plus, chances are that the feeling of guilt about eating one piece of cake and the fact that I was completely starving (and ignoring it totally) because on a diet, I would have gone home and binged all night.
This is not a fantasy. This is exactly what my life was like back then. Hell.
Today, I ate a piece of Galette, not that I really liked it, but because I like this kind of traditional gathering. It is a very sociable moment with collegues, it gives the opportunity to talk about something else than just work, it is a sharing moment.

I chose not to drink champagne because I don't like the way it makes me feel. With only a few drops in my glass though, I raised my glass with everybody around. And I only ate half the slice of cake because this kind of food throws my energy down to the floor.
Whas has changed between "before" and now will you ask? First, I stopped dieting and then I went raw (more about raw foods in future postings).
But what is interesting is, to tell you the truth, I didn't think the Galette today was that good. I mean I know the quality of the product was excellent but it simply doesn't appeal to me anymore. My taste buds did not rejoice. I used to like that. Now, it makes me feel "undernourished". It does contains a lot of calories but they're empty and dead calories. The nourishment though came from being with people, the gathering and the enjoyment of the moment.
And that's what makes such a difference.
With loving thoughts and always with you on the path.

Introduction

I'm Anne, a former compulsive overeater. Former? yeah! Over the years, I healed myself. I'd like this blog to be a help community for compulsive overeaters to share, laugh and cry. You never know how you can touch the heart of someone in need of help or even change the course of her/his life. A single word can make a huge difference. 

We do heal from the addiction to food. I did. I am 48 years young and it took me 25 of these years to get out of this hell. 

To any of you who is suffering and wondering how on earth you are going to get out of this, why you are in so much pain and struggling with your eating, at war with your body, your mind and everything else, constantly dieting and bingeing, I promise you, you will get out of it. 

My overeating started when i was about 14 years. I thought I was plump. I loved to eat. I loooooved chocolate and deserts (still do). What happened? I went on my first diet. I lost 4 pounds or so. Waoh! this thing works! I went straight back to my former eating and gained everything back. The second diet was... different. I was in love. For six months. The longest diet I was ever on. When love vanished, so did the diet. And I binged for three months. Before going on a new diet. 

I did not know at the time but the vicious circle was on. I had crossed the doors to hell. 

Rings a bell? 

I'll tell you more about my long story in future postings. 

Take care, Anne